Astrology shows us what we’re meant to experience and focus on in our lives. We have individual choices around these things, of course. If you’re meant to grow a lot by focusing on your career and you choose to be a stay-at-home mom, for instance, you’re still free to do that. However, you’ll usually feel that you’ve been missing out on something important, especially later in life.
While astrology gives you the blueprint, it doesn’t make you do things against your will. But it does show us what you need to focus on to be happy and have the feeling that your life was worth living.
Because of this, astrology can show us whether or not you do have a twin flame you’re meant to meet and grow within this lifetime. Part of this is because of the roles twin flames and the twin flame journey has in the lives of people who “go down that route.”
But before I explore this, let’s set ourselves straight on the two most common myths about twin flames.
1) Twin Flames are NOT abusive.
Before we dive into the topic, let’s get something straight. There is a false narrative all over the internet that twin flame relationships are always toxic or abusive, or that even suspecting that you and your partner being twin flames means that you’re in an unhealthy relationship pattern.
This is nonsense. Twin flame relationships are not about abuse. While they can turn toxic (as any relationship can), they are supposed to be about love and unconditional acceptance, as well as a shared life purpose. They are meant to remind you that you’re whole. They’re meant to remind you that you are enough. They’re meant to help you step into your soul and live as yourself, fully, without any of the limiting beliefs that hold you back.
That’s the opposite of an abusive or unhealthy relationship pattern.
That being said, twin flame relationships can turn just as toxic as your run-off-the-mill relationships can – or as your family relationships can if you’d like to go a platonic route. Should that happen, please leave. It’s not your job to stay in a relationship that harms you. It’s your job to be you. And if you can only be truly yourself without your TF, then that’s where you’re meant to be. Because…
2) You always have a choice – and so does your partner.
The truth is, not every TF relationship is meant to last. Sometimes, a TF comes into our lives to act as an accelerator for our growth. As soon as that’s done, they leave (which causes you to grow even more), and you get to live your life. This can happen if one of the partners refuses to do the work of looking at their own shadow, fears, and the ways they hide from love.
This can also happen if there is abuse going on. Sometimes, leaving is what’s best for both. While this may suck, the universe does have a better and healthier love for you in store. Take some time to connect to your own soul and see if you can follow the breadcrumbs. Eventually, you’ll find love and happiness again.
You’re not limited to one partnership. Especially not if that partnership isn’t right just now.
How to see in your own chart whether you have a twin flame relationship in store.
There are two things I look at when it comes to the probability of someone meeting their twin flame.
- Their capacity to be a healer
- Their spiritual path in regards to relationships
Now. To be sardonic about it, this sounds nuts. So let’s dive deeper and hopefully explain what I mean by either.
The thing that the twin flame journey is supposed to do is put you deeper in touch with who you really are. Beyond your wounds, beyond conditioning to better “fit in” to society or participate in life, beyond anything you learned about yourself and anything you fear. It’s meant to strip away everything that is not you and replace it with awareness of your soul’s truth of who you really are.
This process is not for the faint of heart, which is why many people never meet their twin flames. It requires you to do a deep dive into the healing journey. This includes psychological wounding and trauma-healing, as well as building some sort of awareness that we’re not just bodies with a brain attached. We do have more in life than we think or like to acknowledge as a society.
Anyone can and does grow through relationships. We’re relational beings. It can’t be helped – and that’s a good thing.
When it comes to twin flame relationships, that growth is intensified and accelerated, so people who are meant to meet their TF have charts that show a big capacity for healing… and for healing quickly. It’s what naturally happens when you meet them, you heal quickly and grow fast.
Eventually, you have the choice to refuse or block that healing (and eventually, you’re kind of required to actively facilitate the growth that’s meant for you, rather than having it “just happen for you.”) But that’s another story.
First and foremost, you need to have the capacity to heal this quickly. If you can’t, the twin flame journey will likely not happen for you this lifetime. But you’re still meant for love and even a soul connection. You’ll just experience one that’s less combustible.
The next part was your spiritual path in terms of your relationships.
We all grow through relationships, obviously, but some people are meant to receive more growth opportunities and are meant to have a bigger focus on that area of their lives. Seeing a chart that’s very heavily relationship-oriented is the second ingredient for a TF chart – the next ingredient is having spiritual planets or points connected to relationships.
The Nitty Gritty Astro-Details.
Before I’ll break those mysterious “spiritual planets or points” down further, let’s go into detail about “relationship-oriented charts.”
These are charts that have a lot going on in the relationship sectors of houses 5, 7, and 8, the signs of Libra, and Scorpio. Their respective rulers as well as the planets Venus, Mars, Juno, Psyche, and the moon are heavily aspected: bonus points if the sun, moon, or rising/their rulers are involved here.
These are the charts that are heavy in the 8th and 12th house, Virgo, and Scorpio, and/or have their rulers, Chiron, and Pluto heavily aspected. Again, bonus points for the involvement of the sun, moon, rising/rulers of either.
A quick reminder about rulership:
- Aries is ruled by Mars
- Taurus is ruled by Venus
- Gemini is ruled by Mercury
- Cancer is ruled by the Moon
- Leo is ruled by the Sun
- Virgo is ruled by Mercury
- Libra is ruled by Venus
- Scorpio is co-ruled by Mars and Pluto
- Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter
- Capricorn is ruled by Saturn
- Aquarius is co-ruled by Saturn and Uranus
- Pisces is co-ruled by Jupiter and Neptune
So, let’s go deeper.
What are those spiritual planets or points?
I’m sure there are many more key players to include here since there are millions of heavenly bodies out there, especially in the Kuiper Belt (Kuiper rhymes with viper). But here are the points, planets, and asteroids I know are relevant, so I’ll keep the list as it is and add more points once I know more.
- The Nodes
Let’s go over these players and explain why they’re spiritual.
Neptune is the planet of spiritual awareness in general. Neptune isn’t as religiously inclined as Jupiter: as a matter of fact, many people I know with strong Neptune’s struggle in churchly environments. But it is a planet of merging with another person’s energy or some principle of your choice, as well as the awareness that there’s something bigger out there than our lives. If you have a strong Neptune, especially one connected to the indicators of relationships in your chart, pay attention.
This is the actual pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Most people have never heard of asteroid Psyche, but it’s the indicator for twin flame and other types of soul relationships as well as psychic gifts and psychology. While everyone has their Psyche somewhere, the way yours is aspected shows what types of soul connections you’re likely to have and in what relationships they show up. This is, therefore, an indicator that can show twin flame relationships as opposed to other types of soul bonds.
Chiron is the “asteroid” (actually centaur) of your biggest wound and your biggest healing capacity. Where Chiron lies, we see which avenues of healing work for you. Therefore, a Chiron connected to relational points in your horoscope shows that you’re likely to heal through relationships. This is key for a TF chart.
Vesta is the asteroid of deep commitment and spiritual growth as well as sacred sexuality and merging with another. A.k.a., it’s key for understanding a twin flame chart – and a high indicator if someone is meant to grow through relationships at all, or soul relationships in particular. If you'd like to know more about your Vesta placement, consider my article Vesta and Sacred Sexuality.
There is nothing more transformative than the healing journey, and no relationship more intense than the twin flame healing journey. Pluto needs to be connected to the relationship indicators of your chart for you to have a twin flame. Otherwise, this just isn’t going to happen. However, Pluto connections to relationship indicators can also speak to a tendency towards abusive relationship patterns. Please take care of yourself and be sure to inform yourself about red flags. To learn more, read my article Beauty and the Beast: Asteroid Juno meets Pluto.
Uranus is the awakener. The rebel. The one who thrives when you step into your individual self and break free of conditioning and restrictions. People on the TF journey ultimately end up doing this, whether they rebel in obvious ways or not. Therefore, Uranus is something to consider.
Last but not least, the North and South Node of the Moon (also known as Rahu and Ketu). These are two mathematical points that indicate the growth your soul is meant to experience throughout this lifetime. You don’t have to have your North or South Node in the Seventh/First houses or conjunct Venus to indicate growth through relationships… but there have to be indicators that relationships are part of your growth journey.
Some of these planets should be heavily involved in the relationship areas of your chart. As a reminder, these are:
The Significators of Relationships in your chart.
- 5: romantic love, pleasure, sexual pleasure, children, creative endeavors, the inner child
- 7: committed relationships of all kinds and relationships that potentially go on forever (business partnerships, marriage, your BFF, committed enemies). Also, legal stuff.
- 8: truth, sexual and financial merging, intimacy, healing, “your stuff,” trauma, and transformation
Look at the planets and points you’ll find in these houses and the houses’ rulers. If a planet mentioned above falls into these houses or has aspects with the ruler (or is one of the rulers), that means there’s a connection here. One connection on its own is not enough though.
Planets, points, and minor bodies.
- Venus: planet of who, how, and why you love, your taste, beauty, feminine energy, and more.
- Mars: planet of assertiveness, sexual energy, who you’re attracted to, your masculine energy, and more.
- Juno: “asteroid” (actually dwarf planet) of the spouse and part of your purpose in life.
- Descendant (DSC): mathematical point indicating what you look for and attract in others. Always falls in the 7th house.
- Moon: “planet” (actually luminary) for any and all relationships that are familiar to you and include deep, unconditional love and a sense of being at home. Also physical home, mother, your body, unconscious, and more.
These are the planets in your natal chart that stand for romantic relationships with other people. Juno in particular stands for the spouse – if you’d like to read more about it here, consider reading my articles Juno-Neptune: Happily Ever After or Living a Nightmare - Asteroid of Marriage meets God of Illusion, Juno-Uranus: Divorce Bringer or Radical Love? Asteroid of Marriage Meets God of Liberation, and Beauty and the Best: Asteroid Juno meets Pluto.
If a planet I mentioned above is connected to these planets or the rulers of these planets, there’s a high probability of twin flame relationships.
Other important factors to consider:
- Venus-Mars conjunctions
- Psyche-Eros conjunctions
- Libra: sign of relationships and compromises. Having many planets here is one possible indicator of relationships being significant in your life.
- Scorpio: sign of merging and sexuality, as well as transformation. Having many planets here is a definite indicator of high healing capacity, especially through relationships and truth.
- Pisces: a sign of spirituality and spiritual relationships. Having many planets here can indicate a yearning for relationships.
- A strong 12th and 1st
Venus-Mars and Psyche-Eros conjunctions are very likely indicators of twin flame relationships throughout your lifetime. (Please know I’m only talking about the conjunctions here, not about other aspects).
You don’t have to have either in your chart to be a TF, but if you see them, know it’s a likely indicator for something going on here. This is especially the case if the conjunctions fall into the first, seventh, eighth, or twelfth house.
The signs mentioned are also further confirmation, and houses 12 and 1 are also very important in TF charts since the twelfth house has to do with karmic baggage (which can include soul connections). The first house indicates our life path and relationship with ourselves, which is something the TF journey focuses on: the love you share is meant to bring you home to who you are and help you show up in the world.
Putting it all together:
Essentially, you’ll want to know if:
- You have spiritual planets connected to identity-giving points in your chart (1st house, sun, chart ruler, ruler of the sun)
- You have spiritual planets connected to the relationship areas of your life (Venus, Mars, Juno, Moon, 5th, 7th, 8th)
- You have strong relationship areas, to begin with
- You have strong indicators for transformation and healing in your chart (strong Pluto, Chiron, Scorpio, Virgo, etc.)
- You have indicators for transformation and healing connected with your relationship-indicators
- And there are bonus points such as Eros-Psyche / Venus-Mars conjunctions, strong 12th/1st house, etc.
If those things are the case, you’ll likely meet your twin flame throughout your lifetime. (This of course has partly to do with individual choice, too.)
To go further, the deeper symbolism behind your Venus, Mars, Psyche, etc. will help you figure out how you’ll meet your twin flame and how to navigate the journey with ease and flow.
Going into that in-depth would be a bit too much for this article… but there will be others coming soon! In the meantime, enjoy browsing my blog. Here are some further reading suggestions if this topic interested you.
Meet you there,